Today we talk to Julie who has agreed to share her experiences with benzodiazepines and withdrawal. If you wish to share your own Benzo Story we would be honored to tell it.
How It Began
My name is Julie Johnson. I am 51 yrs old. I was prescribed clonazepam, 2mg, at age 23 after a visit to a psychiatrist.
I started feeling anxious at work and had to quit my job. I took it as prescribed. I went back to school and became a school support worker for many years.
I took 2mg in the morning and some days had to take another before I went in the lunchroom.
Two Decades Later
Fast forward to age 45. I went to my Dr. at the time and she said I can’t prescribe you clonazepam anymore.
I feared for my life.
Other Health Issues While On Benzos
While on the benzos, I had other health issues, specifically endometriosis. I finally had a partial hysterectomy, which meant I would never have children, whom I adored. I had neck surgery supposedly from being rear ended, which is now arthritis. I fell on ice at work and hurt my wrist which resulted in surgery.
Withdrawal Was Severe
While in withdrawal, I fell down the stairs and hurt my back. Around the same time as being cut off, my husband and I were in the process of adopting.
We got our son but I was very sick and bedridden so he went into daycare.
I could not leave my house many days due to the horrific burning in my brain, brain fog, pain, exhaustion. I am currently trying to taper off 0.25mg.. half of that in the morning and half at night.
There are days I didn't want to be here (many).
Anxiety Persists
My anxiety still rules my life, I don't like being a mom like this. I have so much guilt, I feel that I've ruined my son’s and husband's lives.
I would never have taken that medication if I was told the damage they cause. I pray one day I will be free, but the thought scares me to death since I know the horrific withdrawals. Thanks for listening!
Final Words From Benzo Warrior
Thank you so much Julie for sharing your story with us. We hope this helps others feel less alone with the experiences they are having as they take charge of their health and withdraw from these medications.
It is worth noting that anyone taking these medications is at risk of dependence, tolerance and addiction, even when taken exactly ‘as prescribed’.
If you are in need of support as you withdraw and heal from these medications please join us in the private Benzo Warrior Community on Facebook.